Spoof Thread

Before coming here i hung around on Jplegacy, where there was a thread were you could post spoofs of an RPG you were playing. I thought something like that would be fun here.

Savages

*Two Orcs are sitting at a table drinking tea*
Orc 1: I do say Reginald, those ghastly Scondovians are it at again! With all their crimson hand poppycock. What a dreadful state we're in.
Reginald: Nyess Krag- Zot, it's obvious that they're getting quite rowdy as of late. Shall we send a couple lads to "Knock them around a bit" as they say?
Krag Zot: Oh yes Reginald, do so at once!
Reginald: Sahll we bring the Asagonese too?
Krag Zot: Of course! More the merrier!

*One battle later*

*Asagonese soldier is eating a Scondovian knight*
Soldier: Omnomnomnomnomnomnomnom ^_^ *BELCH*
Krag: *Gasp* What savages! Cover your eyes Reginald!
Reginald: *Covers eyes*

This is awesome. I am glad someone has noticed that I am trying to make the Chiidians look like stereotyped Brits.

Souran wrote: This is awesome. I am glad someone has noticed that I am trying to make the Chiidians look like stereotyped Brits.

Only with big, ugly teeth and inadequate hygie... OH WAIT

I'm British ;D

Trio Alliance Tea Party

Braddia: ALRIGHT! The first meeting of the Trio Alliance has begun!
Sirdovia: >.>
Chiid: <.<
Braddia: Aww c'mon you two, try to socialise with eachother!
Chiid: .... Greetings kind sir
Sirdovia: DO NOT SPEAK DEMON! FOR IT OFFENDS THE CHURCH OF THE CRIMSON HAND!
Chiid: How?
Sirdovia: BLLLAAAAAASSSSPPPPHHHHEEMMMMMYYYY

*Meanwhile, with the Asagonese and Alledonians*

Alledon: Huh, why don't we have a cool alliance name like that?
Asagon: I don't know, we should hire someone to do it for us. *Eating a Chiidian soldier*
Alledon: You do know we ave to bury him? International law and such?
Asagon: HE'S TOO TASTY!
Alledon: -_- we're totally screwed.

*Braddia turns head and sees Alledon and Asagon hiding in a bush*
Asagon: ... Hai <:3 *Hides dead soldier*
Sirdovia: DEEEEMMMMMMMOOOONNNNN!
Chiid: agreed *Sharpens war axe*
alledon: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

The Trouble with Saurians

Alledon: Hey, Asagon?
Asagon: what?
Alledon: You know how all the species in realm are all from lord of the rings and such?
Asagon: Yeaaaaah
Alledon: Then why are you a sentient Dinosaur? Shouldn't you be an Elf or something? i don't know, something that keeps the theme?
Asagon: Well yeah, but how else would i explain being able to ride a T-Rex into battle?
Alledon: You don't have to be the same species as the friggin T-Rex! -_-
Asagon: Whatever, say your soldiers look mighty tasty... >
Alledon: >:E3 NO ASAGON! *Sprays Asagon with cold water*
Asagon: hiiissssss >

UAK wrote:Trio Alliance Tea Party

Braddia: ALRIGHT! The first meeting of the Trio Alliance has begun!
Sirdovia: >.>
Chiid: <.<
Braddia: Aww c'mon you two, try to socialise with eachother!
Chiid: .... Greetings kind sir
Sirdovia: DO NOT SPEAK DEMON! FOR IT OFFENDS THE CHURCH OF THE CRIMSON HAND!
Chiid: How?
Sirdovia: BLLLAAAAAASSSSPPPPHHHHEEMMMMMYYYY

*Meanwhile, with the Asagonese and Alledonians*

Alledon: Huh, why don't we have a cool alliance name like that?
Asagon: I don't know, we should hire someone to do it for us. *Eating a Chiidian soldier*
Alledon: You do know we ave to bury him? International law and such?
Asagon: HE'S TOO TASTY!
Alledon: -_- we're totally screwed.

*Braddia turns head and sees Alledon and Asagon hiding in a bush*
Asagon: ... Hai <:3 *Hides dead soldier*
Sirdovia: DEEEEMMMMMMMOOOONNNNN!
Chiid: agreed *Sharpens war axe*
alledon: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

The Trouble with Saurians

Alledon: Hey, Asagon?
Asagon: what?
Alledon: You know how all the species in realm are all from lord of the rings and such?
Asagon: Yeaaaaah
Alledon: Then why are you a sentient Dinosaur? Shouldn't you be an Elf or something? i don't know, something that keeps the theme?
Asagon: Well yeah, but how else would i explain being able to ride a T-Rex into battle?
Alledon: You don't have to be the same species as the friggin T-Rex! -_-
Asagon: Whatever, say your soldiers look mighty tasty... >
Alledon: >:E3 NO ASAGON! *Sprays Asagon with cold water*
Asagon: hiiissssss >

LMAO brilliant!

The Great Realm War IN A NUTSHELL (Containing Steroids!)

Braddia: HEY ASAGON HUUUURRGHH *Flexes muscles*
Asagon: WHHHHAAAAAAT?
Braddia: YOUR MOM!
Asagon: RRAAAAAAARGGG *Invades Braddia*
Sirdovia: GET
Chiid: THE
FDA: F*CK
Sirdovia: OUT
Chiid: OF
Braddia: BRADDIA
Asagon: OH NO!
Alledon: OH YEAH! *Bursts through the wall with massive pecs*
Asagon: LETS KILL EM ALLEDON!
Alledon: OH NO! (exits through wall)
Sirdovia: *Punches Diamond*
Alledon OH YEAH! *Bursts through the wal*

Yup, pretty much

Spelling

Asagon: >:C
Chiid: Whats wrong with you?
Asagon: Everyone spells my name as Asegon for some reason, its Asagon not Asegon!
Chiid: Cry moar, no one even says my name right >
Asagon: It's spelt right on the forum!
Chiid: Fair play... but don't you spell it as Asegon as well?
Asagon: ... Well played. Well Played.

I spell it Asagon...

Sir Rian wrote:I spell it Asagon...

ASSagon

Veriti's Cooch

Braddia: So... she shot soldiers out of her... crotch?
Asagon: DAMN RIGHT!
Braddia: Like, actual soldiers, swords and all?
Asagon: F*CK YEAH!
Braddia: Mmmkay, then why is she in heaven? She would've survived if she could shoot Soldiers out of her... parts?
Asagon: *Holds up an Egg* This is why
Braddia: WHAT DOES FOOD HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?
Asagon: *Bitchslaps Braddia* THAT'S MY F*CKING SON!

PRA wrote:Veriti's Cooch

Braddia: So... she shot soldiers out of her... crotch?
Asagon: DAMN RIGHT!
Braddia: Like, actual soldiers, swords and all?
Asagon: F*CK YEAH!
Braddia: Mmmkay, then why is she in heaven? She would've survived if she could shoot Soldiers out of her... parts?
Asagon: *Holds up an Egg* This is why
Braddia: WHAT DOES FOOD HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?
Asagon: *Bitchslaps Braddia* THAT'S MY F*CKING SON!

At the market:

guy: Hello what a good day Whurll has blessed us with
sailsman: indeed it is, what can i do for you?
guy: do you have eggs?
Sailsman: Yes but not chicken eggs we sold those to the marines to throw on the Assagoneese Ships.
Guy: What kind of eggs do you got then?
Sailsmen: Saurian Eggs, there not as good as Chickens but you get more food out of one egg.
Guy: ill tkae 100!

Chiid: Well seeing that theres no wars on at the moment, wanna play checkers?

*Eldar bursts out of Way Gate and kills Chiid*

Chiid: Noooooooooo!!!!
Alledon: WE WILL KEEL YOU!!!!!

*Eldar enslaves Alledon*

Braddia: By Whurll we will triumph.
Eldar: Naha
Braddia: Ahaha
Eldar: Naha
Braddia: Ahaha
Eldar: Make me!
Braddia: Takes one to know one!
Eldar: Toushe.